Burglary - how do they rationalise it?

Having just got news that our neighbour had an attempted burglary overnight (they got into garage, tried to access the house while neighbours were home!), it has got me thinking, how do thieves rationalise their behaviour?

Maybe I am way off base, and there is no rational thought to it, but surely there has to be a moment in every thief's life where they think "why?".

Why do they feel entitled to take what isn't theirs?
Why do they think it is ok to scare the life out of people by breaking into their homes?

I know most theft is for financial reasons, either needing money to survive, or to feed addictions, be it drugs, alcohol, gambling, etc. But I really do wonder if they understand how their victims feel, and if they do, do they care?

I have only had one instance of theft affect me directly (touch wood!), I stupidly left my backpack in my car when living in inner Melbourne, and the next morning the back door was open and backpack was missing, luckily it only contained a few easily replaced books, and some notes.

However what was lost is not the point, the point is the feeling of being violated and having someone pilfer through your things and life.

I can only imagine (I hope to the gods we never have it happen to us!) what people must go through if they have their home ransacked, even moreso if they are home when it happened.

Friends have had it happened, and one good friend still, some 6 years later, cannot be at home alone. She was asleep in an upstairs bedroom, when thieves broke in and ransacked her lounge and study, taking her stereo, tv, laptop, ipod.  She wakes to every noise in the house, and if her husband is away she will stay with friends/family instead of being at home.

That one instance of someone invading her home and stealing her things, has changed her, maybe for good. I find that terribly sad.

Mr Mel and I installed a monitored security system last year, we don't live in a bad area, we wanted it as peace of mind, as we are away a fair bit, with work or family commitments.

After last nights burglary next door, we are now going to install a sensor light in the front yard, it might be overkill, but I would rather take the extra precaution and hope like hell it never happens to us. And I hope karma catches up with all burglars/thieves sooner rather than later!!

Till next time,

Yowsers that was quick!

The world sure is a funny place, I posted an entry earlier today asking why I can't seem to ever ask for or accept help.

Well 2 hours after my post, Mr Mel received a call from a friend whose brother-in-law is a printer, he asked if we would accept printing of our invitations as an engagement gift!

And guess what??  I said  

How is that for the stars aligning, karma knocking, whatever you'd like to call it!

My form reversal probably has more to do with my failed craft effort yesterday (DIY invites eek), than a change in attitude, but hey gotta start somewhere!

Till next time,

Why it so hard to say YES?

For as long as I can remember I've never been one to either ask for, or accept offers of help.  I'm sure Freud would have a field day explaining the myriad of reasons why, but at the moment I'm not sure what the answer is.

Mr Freud - what do u reckon?

I moved out of home at 19, moved 300km+ away to Melbourne, and rented a house on my own, it was tough, I was paying off a car loan, paying rent, and was a Trainee, where I worked 3 days and went to school 2 days, needless to say my pay packet was miserly.

Even though I had virtually no 'spare' money and would often have cereal or toast 3 meals a day for days on end, I could never bring myself to say 'yes please' when my parents would offer to deposit extra funds in my bank account, my answer was always 'no I'm fine don't worry about it'.  I would then lay awake in bed calculating how much it would cost me to get to work until the next pay day.

At work I would, and still do, stay back ridiculously late after work to get through my workload, when bosses or colleagues would ask if I needed a hand I'd fob them off saying I was fine.

When I was at school, I would be walking home in the pouring rain, friends parents would pull up and ask if I wanted a ride, I'd refuse with a smile.

I moved house about 17 times in 15 years in Melbourne, only twice in those 17 moves did I have anyone help me, once because I was moving out of a house i shared with friends and I helped them move, and the other because my Mum insisted.  The other 15 times I slaved away, staying up till all hours packing, doing hundreds of trips in my car to move whatever would fit, then co-ordinating with the removalists for the bigger items.

Now in my late 30's I seem to have alot of balls in the air, full-time job 5 days a week, managing house & personal finances for Mr Mel & I, managing finances for Mr Mel's business, setting up new business for Mr Mel & I, trying to lose weight and get fit at the gym, and now getting our wedding together.

On the weekend, Mr Mel suggested we hand over the wine sourcing to his Dad (wine buff and wants to help), and my immediate answer was 'no it's fine I'll sort it', meanwhile in my head my brain was going 'great yes please', but that's where it stayed.

So last night I was up till 2am trying to design & make the invitations for our wedding, I was up at 5.45am to go to the gym, and then to work at 8am, will be home at 6pm tonight, and no doubt tonight, as has happened every night for the past 2 weeks I'll be up till after midnight getting through my To Do list.

This isn't a whinge or a woe is me post, nor should it be read as a negative about Mr Mel, he does more than his fair share around here, and continues to offer help with my load, which as you would expect I refuse!! I'm not looking for a pat on the back, just curious.

Is it a female thing, not wanting to admit we need help, or not wanting to be seen to be weak?

Is it a control thing, not wanting to relinquish control in case not done right?

I'm not sure, but I hope one day I'll learn the answer and say 'yes please/thanks that would be great', alot more often!

Till next time,